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America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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People that say I'm really sensitive rarely are.
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Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
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The human spirit is indomitable, unless your talking specifically about the people I know.
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I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
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A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
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What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing something they don't want to do just for sex. Isn't that called a first date, man? If sex was the result of something I wanted to do, there'd be condoms all over my PlayStation.
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The downside of aging is a slower metabolism and achy joints.The upside is a knowledge of self that prevents one from behaving like a baboon.
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I spend so much time alone that whenever I see my shadow I feel crowded.
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The entertainment business is to business what plastic flowers are to flowers.
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People who say life is precious don't spend much time on line at the airport.
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Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.
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Facebook is great for getting upset about things people say even though you haven't seen them in 12 years.
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Why hasn't anyone opened a night club named 'No Drugs Allowed, Wink, Wink'?
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Being proud of your nationality is like congratulating yourself for inheriting money.
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If only St. Valentine was around to see his memory celebrated through the mindless marketing of whipping cream and lingerie.
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We should create a holiday that celebrates money for what it is, essentially worthless paper, upon which we agree to pretend it has value.
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I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.
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