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You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Thinking
Yelled
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Kidding
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Anger
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Think

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Facebook is great for getting upset about things people say even though you haven't seen them in 12 years.
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Perhaps depression is a perfectly natural reaction to the human condition.
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Next time I spank a girl during sex, I'll say, this is going to hurt me more than it will you.
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I wish I could be attracted to unattractive women. They're just more interesting.
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Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
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Comedy is rarely funny.
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False humility is thinly veiled ego disguised as self confidence.
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I've decided to become gay, not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house.
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People shouldn't take my lack of interest in what they're saying personally. I don't really care about what I'm saying most of the time.
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The language of love may be universal, but it's not one of the options on an ATM machine.
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Living one's life with unguarded vulnerability is one of the keys to happiness. It's also one of the keys to getting mugged.
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Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.
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People that say I'm really sensitive rarely are.
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Is it a bad sign when someone asks you about the person your dating and a tear falls from your eye as you leap into oncoming traffic?
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All politicians promise that which they cannot deliver. I just wish they did so less gleefully.
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Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.
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A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
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I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.
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America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.
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Statistically speaking, when a woman says I'm not going to have sex with you, she'll often have sex with you.
Dov Davidoff