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You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Sandwiches
Anger
Issues
Think
Thinking
Yelled
Sandwich
Kidding

More quotes by Dov Davidoff

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Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
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Can you spare some change? is never a good pick up line.
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Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth... I guess.
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Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.
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Suicide is a terrible idea, but if you're going to end it, do so at a Pinkberry near you.
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The downside of aging is a slower metabolism and achy joints.The upside is a knowledge of self that prevents one from behaving like a baboon.
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Canadians are like Americans, just less racist, violent, and ignorant.
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Is it a bad sign when someone asks you about the person your dating and a tear falls from your eye as you leap into oncoming traffic?
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Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I'm less of a man than I'd like to be.
Dov Davidoff
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Thinking about the fathomless cruelty with which man has treated his fellow man, but also ice cream.
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If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.
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No one understands the way I feel about things I don't understand.
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Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.
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The human spirit is indomitable, unless your talking specifically about the people I know.
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When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don't always like that.
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Living by the beach means feeling guilty about never going to the beach.
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I'm no quitter, unless it comes to human relationships or math and science.
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Just saw a woman with a t-shirt that said southern and sassy, it's all good. Well madame, I beg to differ, it is in fact, not 'all good'.
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Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.
Dov Davidoff
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Every time I see someone taking care of a baby, I think why in the world would anyone willingly saddle themselves with that responsibility?
Dov Davidoff