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Age is just a number, unless of course your trying to have a conversation with them.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
I'm neither professional fighter nor physicist, therefore on some level I will always consider myself a failure.
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Skin heads are doing an awful job of promoting racism. You guys need to loosen up, and for god's sake would it kill you to smile.
Dov Davidoff
Next time I spank a girl during sex, I'll say, this is going to hurt me more than it will you.
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Anticipation almost always exceeds the reality of that which we anticipated.
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The Nazis were well dressed. Today's racists are a rag-tag bunch with no sense of style or panache.
Dov Davidoff
Just saw a woman with a t-shirt that said southern and sassy, it's all good. Well madame, I beg to differ, it is in fact, not 'all good'.
Dov Davidoff
Few things are more annoying than too many of any one ethnicity in the same room.
Dov Davidoff
Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth... I guess.
Dov Davidoff
If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.
Dov Davidoff
Many television weather-women were one abusive parent away from prostitution.
Dov Davidoff
Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
Dov Davidoff
Sleep is over rated, then again so is being awake.
Dov Davidoff
Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
Dov Davidoff
Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.
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I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
Dov Davidoff
Suicide is a terrible idea, but if you're going to end it, do so at a Pinkberry near you.
Dov Davidoff
You can't assume the best about people. If I get a girl home and she takes her pants off, and it looks like she's got herpes, I can't afford to assume she got stung by a pack of bees.
Dov Davidoff
People who say life is precious don't spend much time on line at the airport.
Dov Davidoff
People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.
Dov Davidoff
Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.
Dov Davidoff