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You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Organic
Lack
Prison
Lived
Produce
Fear
Long

More quotes by Dov Davidoff

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The rift between culture and pop-culture has never been greater.
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The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.
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America is a hot chick with a bad personality. Take her seriously and you'll end up hating yourself.
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Just saw a woman with a t-shirt that said southern and sassy, it's all good. Well madame, I beg to differ, it is in fact, not 'all good'.
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If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.
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Life is fragile, unless your in the NFL in which case you'll need to wear padding.
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What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing something they don't want to do just for sex. Isn't that called a first date, man? If sex was the result of something I wanted to do, there'd be condoms all over my PlayStation.
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Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.
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Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
Dov Davidoff
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Many television weather-women were one abusive parent away from prostitution.
Dov Davidoff
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Someday I'd like to be a father, not of a human child, but something more reasonable.
Dov Davidoff
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Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.
Dov Davidoff
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Bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend sends you reeling in a search for new adjectives to describe stupidity and thoughtlessness?
Dov Davidoff
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I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.
Dov Davidoff
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When maintaining a relationship means diminishing your self, it's time to walk.
Dov Davidoff
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Big black guys fear air travel almost as much as old white women fear big black guys.
Dov Davidoff
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The more I get to know people, the less I know about people.
Dov Davidoff
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The Nazis were well dressed. Today's racists are a rag-tag bunch with no sense of style or panache.
Dov Davidoff
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Skin heads are doing an awful job of promoting racism. You guys need to loosen up, and for god's sake would it kill you to smile.
Dov Davidoff
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Latin women enjoy being women more than other women.
Dov Davidoff