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I'm neither professional fighter nor physicist, therefore on some level I will always consider myself a failure.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Neither
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Failure
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Always
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The rift between culture and pop-culture has never been greater.
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Violence is never the answer, unless you don't feel like talking.
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Sleep is over rated, then again so is being awake.
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I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
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My bedroom is so messy, if I died of natural causes, the cops would be like no he didn't, clearly there was a struggle.
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Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
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Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
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Big black guys fear air travel almost as much as old white women fear big black guys.
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My dad was old school Jewish. Not do your taxes Jewish - steal your car Jewish.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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Upside of being an attractive woman if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.
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I spend so much time alone that whenever I see my shadow I feel crowded.
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Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to do with him.
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People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.
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Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.
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Anticipation almost always exceeds the reality of that which we anticipated.
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Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
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I wish that every other guy were gay. Think about the leverage that would create in your relationship.
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When rappers call each other son it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.
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