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All politicians promise that which they cannot deliver. I just wish they did so less gleefully.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Cannot
Gleefully
Deliver
Politicians
Politician
Promise
Politics
Less
Wish

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Love is nature's LSD. You're going to see things that aren't really there.
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I would imagine that most of the people who consider themselves successful aren't, at least in the ways that really matter-myself included.
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MTV has turned more young women into whores than poverty.
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Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
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Sleep is over rated, then again so is being awake.
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You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.
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The language of love may be universal, but it's not one of the options on an ATM machine.
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The Nazis were well dressed. Today's racists are a rag-tag bunch with no sense of style or panache.
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I wonder if anybody ever decided to commit suicide, then thought but first I'm going to stop by that taco place I like so much.
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Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.
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Drugs in a disco are great for white people because it allows them to feel more Puerto Rican while dancing.
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People who say life is precious don't spend much time on line at the airport.
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I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.
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Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I'm less of a man than I'd like to be.
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Do you ever have one of those weeks where you know nothings gonna go right?
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It's difficult to feel silly and depressed at the same time, but I manage.
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Next time I spank a girl during sex, I'll say, this is going to hurt me more than it will you.
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Suicide is a terrible idea, but if you're going to end it, do so at a Pinkberry near you.
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The entertainment business is to business what plastic flowers are to flowers.
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People shouldn't take my lack of interest in what they're saying personally. I don't really care about what I'm saying most of the time.
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