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I'm passionate about gay rights, but I think we need admit that there are some gay wrongs as well.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff

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Cheerleaders are simultaneously everything that is right and wrong with the world.
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When cornered, a rattle snake can become so angry it's been known to bite itself, which is exactly how I feel in traffic and relationships.
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I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.
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My dad was old school Jewish. Not do your taxes Jewish - steal your car Jewish.
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Comedy is rarely funny.
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We're in this together usually means I'm here for you, unless it requires me getting into my car anywhere near rush hour.
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Is it a bad sign when someone asks you about the person your dating and a tear falls from your eye as you leap into oncoming traffic?
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The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.
Dov Davidoff
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Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.
Dov Davidoff
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It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.
Dov Davidoff
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The quality of a restaurant's food is inversely proportioned to the amount of fun its staff seems to be having.
Dov Davidoff
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Nike store won't accept my Starbucks card as payment. Come on guys, just do it.
Dov Davidoff
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Looking into blood doping. I think it will allow me to write jokes with greater intensity, and for a longer period of time.
Dov Davidoff
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Few things are more annoying than too many of any one ethnicity in the same room.
Dov Davidoff
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If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.
Dov Davidoff
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If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.
Dov Davidoff
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Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.
Dov Davidoff
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Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem?
Dov Davidoff
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Upside of being an attractive woman if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.
Dov Davidoff
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Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.
Dov Davidoff