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The rift between culture and pop-culture has never been greater.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
Being proud of your nationality is like congratulating yourself for inheriting money.
Dov Davidoff
You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.
Dov Davidoff
I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.
Dov Davidoff
Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
Dov Davidoff
Just saw a woman with a t-shirt that said southern and sassy, it's all good. Well madame, I beg to differ, it is in fact, not 'all good'.
Dov Davidoff
The quality of a restaurant's food is inversely proportioned to the amount of fun its staff seems to be having.
Dov Davidoff
Drugs in a disco are great for white people because it allows them to feel more Puerto Rican while dancing.
Dov Davidoff
It's a shame that physical beauty often has such a negative effect on its occupant.
Dov Davidoff
The color red is associated with romance and blood, but not at the same time.
Dov Davidoff
America's objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women.
Dov Davidoff
Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.
Dov Davidoff
Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
Dov Davidoff
Few things interest me more than the things people don't say.
Dov Davidoff
Suicide is a terrible idea, but if you're going to end it, do so at a Pinkberry near you.
Dov Davidoff
False humility is thinly veiled ego disguised as self confidence.
Dov Davidoff
Fake titties are inversely proportioned to their owners level of self esteem. This being said, part of me loves them.
Dov Davidoff
Why hasn't anyone opened a night club named 'No Drugs Allowed, Wink, Wink'?
Dov Davidoff
People shouldn't take my lack of interest in what they're saying personally. I don't really care about what I'm saying most of the time.
Dov Davidoff
Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I'm less of a man than I'd like to be.
Dov Davidoff
Skin heads are doing an awful job of promoting racism. You guys need to loosen up, and for god's sake would it kill you to smile.
Dov Davidoff