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Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Polygraph
Couple
Happy
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The human spirit is indomitable, unless your talking specifically about the people I know.
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Whoever said life without love isn't worth living didn't own an iPhone. These things are great.
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Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.
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Sleep is over rated, then again so is being awake.
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I wish that every other guy were gay. Think about the leverage that would create in your relationship.
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People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.
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Everybody's angry with me because, apparently, I outed my cousin during an argument over a turkey leg. My cousin goes, 'You had the last leg.' I was like, 'You're gay.
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Just saw a t-shirt at the gym said, body by torture. That's a lot less ironic if you're a political prisoner in the Middle East.
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Women want a man who is sensitive, but god forbid you can't get it up after being frightened by a small woodland animal.
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If only St. Valentine was around to see his memory celebrated through the mindless marketing of whipping cream and lingerie.
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Can you spare some change? is never a good pick up line.
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Hard to explain to a guard dog that you need it to protect you from yourself.
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We're in this together usually means I'm here for you, unless it requires me getting into my car anywhere near rush hour.
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The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.
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I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.
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I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.
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Latin women enjoy being women more than other women.
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Violence is never the answer, unless you don't feel like talking.
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Brain damage and stupidity are very different things, but can have similar effects on the wearer.
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Heard someone say children are god's gift to the world. What world are you referring to? And what's your definition of gift?
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