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Many television weather-women were one abusive parent away from prostitution.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
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I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.
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When rappers call each other son it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.
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Upside of being an attractive woman if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.
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Hard to explain to a guard dog that you need it to protect you from yourself.
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Can you spare some change? is never a good pick up line.
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I think you have a lot to offer... not necessarily as a person, but as an organ donor.
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I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
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Few things are as uniquely painful as bad comedy, and the realization that the human mind is a house of mirrors with no entrance and no exit.
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The more I get to know people, the less I know about people.
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Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.
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I wish I could be attracted to unattractive women. They're just more interesting.
Dov Davidoff
When cornered, a rattle snake can become so angry it's been known to bite itself, which is exactly how I feel in traffic and relationships.
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The rift between culture and pop-culture has never been greater.
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Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.
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Writing good jokes requires effort. Think I'll just start dressing funnier.
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The quality of a restaurant's food is inversely proportioned to the amount of fun its staff seems to be having.
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Every time I see someone taking care of a baby, I think why in the world would anyone willingly saddle themselves with that responsibility?
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MTV has turned more young women into whores than poverty.
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Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is different.
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