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Few things are as uniquely painful as bad comedy, and the realization that the human mind is a house of mirrors with no entrance and no exit.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff

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When being interviewed by a woman for a job, never begin with listen up doll face.
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I would imagine that most of the people who consider themselves successful aren't, at least in the ways that really matter-myself included.
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Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.
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Anyone who says I would never hit a woman hasn't met my x girlfriend.
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Canadians are like Americans, just less racist, violent, and ignorant.
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Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.
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Whoever said life without love isn't worth living didn't own an iPhone. These things are great.
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Facebook is great for getting upset about things people say even though you haven't seen them in 12 years.
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Gotta get rid of these free radicals, but first I need to figure out what they are.
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I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.
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Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.
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Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
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Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is different.
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People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.
Dov Davidoff
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I'm neither professional fighter nor physicist, therefore on some level I will always consider myself a failure.
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Upside of being an attractive woman if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.
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I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.
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Animals look at people the way people look at people that might mug them.
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People increase their use of the term 'sir' when their angry. Little do they know, it only causes me to feel more like I'm wearing a top hat.
Dov Davidoff