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Nike store won't accept my Starbucks card as payment. Come on guys, just do it.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
It's difficult to feel silly and depressed at the same time, but I manage.
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It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.
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You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.
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Gotta get rid of these free radicals, but first I need to figure out what they are.
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People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.
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Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.
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Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.
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Not sure how I feel about reality. I'm going to begin purchasing stuffed animals and endowing them with the qualities people in my life lack.
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I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
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I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.
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Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
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Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.
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Living one's life with unguarded vulnerability is one of the keys to happiness. It's also one of the keys to getting mugged.
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I've decided to become gay, not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house.
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Everybody wants to be more wanted, until they are.
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If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.
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If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.
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Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.
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