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Statistically speaking, when a woman says I'm not going to have sex with you, she'll often have sex with you.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.
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If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.
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Sleep is over rated, then again so is being awake.
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Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw police lights in you're rear view mirror?
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Latin women enjoy being women more than other women.
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Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.
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I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.
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A picture is worth a thousand words, but conversations with them generally end in dissapointment.
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If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.
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If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
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Age is just a number, unless of course your trying to have a conversation with them.
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My job as a comedian is to heighten awareness about locally grown produce, fight factory farming, and promote euthanasia, but in a funny way.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
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