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Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to do with him.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Nothing
Thanking
Parking
Spot
Spots
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff

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The human spirit is indomitable, unless your talking specifically about the people I know.
Dov Davidoff
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Was thinking of taking a yoga class, then realized I wasn't gay. Whew. Close one.
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You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.
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Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth... I guess.
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Many television weather-women were one abusive parent away from prostitution.
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People who say life is precious don't spend much time on line at the airport.
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Skin heads are doing an awful job of promoting racism. You guys need to loosen up, and for god's sake would it kill you to smile.
Dov Davidoff
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Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
Dov Davidoff
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Upside of being an attractive woman if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.
Dov Davidoff
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The more I get to know people, the less I know about people.
Dov Davidoff
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Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
Dov Davidoff
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Fountains are more romantic when you don't hate the person you're with.
Dov Davidoff
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Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I'm less of a man than I'd like to be.
Dov Davidoff
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I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.
Dov Davidoff
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Gotta get rid of these free radicals, but first I need to figure out what they are.
Dov Davidoff
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America's objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women.
Dov Davidoff
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I like Irish pubs, except for all the loud music and drinking, and people acting like idiots.
Dov Davidoff
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Latin women enjoy being women more than other women.
Dov Davidoff
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I think you have a lot to offer... not necessarily as a person, but as an organ donor.
Dov Davidoff
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When rappers call each other son it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.
Dov Davidoff