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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
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Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem?
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No one understands the way I feel about things I don't understand.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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TV can be an acronym for television or transvestite. I prefer using it to describe the the latter. The former is strange and undignified.
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Thinking about the fathomless cruelty with which man has treated his fellow man, but also ice cream.
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The Statue of Liberty really is profound, I just wish she'd lighten up a bit.
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Please reduce the expectation in your tone when asking me how my day is going.
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Bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend sends you reeling in a search for new adjectives to describe stupidity and thoughtlessness?
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If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.
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I've decided to become gay, not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house.
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The entertainment business is to business what plastic flowers are to flowers.
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Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
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People that say I'm really sensitive rarely are.
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Every time I see someone taking care of a baby, I think why in the world would anyone willingly saddle themselves with that responsibility?
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Anticipation almost always exceeds the reality of that which we anticipated.
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All politicians promise that which they cannot deliver. I just wish they did so less gleefully.
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Violence is never the answer, unless you don't feel like talking.
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Few things are more annoying than too many of any one ethnicity in the same room.
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Animals look at people the way people look at people that might mug them.
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