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Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Funny
Together
Live
Domestic
Especially
Violence

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Living one's life with unguarded vulnerability is one of the keys to happiness. It's also one of the keys to getting mugged.
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I've decided to retreat to the spirit world where I feel appreciated and understood.
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Sleep is over rated, then again so is being awake.
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Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to do with him.
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America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.
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Fake titties are inversely proportioned to their owners level of self esteem. This being said, part of me loves them.
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Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
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America is a hot chick with a bad personality. Take her seriously and you'll end up hating yourself.
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Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.
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Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.
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Brain damage and stupidity are very different things, but can have similar effects on the wearer.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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Pine nuts pound for pound are more expensive than most varieties of smoked salmon. There I said it.
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We should create a holiday that celebrates money for what it is, essentially worthless paper, upon which we agree to pretend it has value.
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The color red is associated with romance and blood, but not at the same time.
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If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
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