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Please reduce the expectation in your tone when asking me how my day is going.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
Thinking about the fathomless cruelty with which man has treated his fellow man, but also ice cream.
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Few things are more annoying than too many of any one ethnicity in the same room.
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Living one's life with unguarded vulnerability is one of the keys to happiness. It's also one of the keys to getting mugged.
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Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.
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Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth... I guess.
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Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.
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Skin heads are doing an awful job of promoting racism. You guys need to loosen up, and for god's sake would it kill you to smile.
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If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.
Dov Davidoff
Everybody's angry with me because, apparently, I outed my cousin during an argument over a turkey leg. My cousin goes, 'You had the last leg.' I was like, 'You're gay.
Dov Davidoff
If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.
Dov Davidoff
Perhaps depression is a perfectly natural reaction to the human condition.
Dov Davidoff
I've decided to become gay, not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house.
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Life is fragile, unless your in the NFL in which case you'll need to wear padding.
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It's a shame that physical beauty often has such a negative effect on its occupant.
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Do you love me for me?... I don't even love me for me.
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Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw police lights in you're rear view mirror?
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Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
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I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.
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TV can be an acronym for television or transvestite. I prefer using it to describe the the latter. The former is strange and undignified.
Dov Davidoff
If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.
Dov Davidoff