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Animals look at people the way people look at people that might mug them.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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Canadians are like Americans, just less racist, violent, and ignorant.
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I'm neither professional fighter nor physicist, therefore on some level I will always consider myself a failure.
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Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.
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Facebook is great for getting upset about things people say even though you haven't seen them in 12 years.
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America's objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women.
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How come the term 'threesome' is always used in a sexual context? What, nobody plays string instruments any more?
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Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is different.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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The quality of a restaurant's food is inversely proportioned to the amount of fun its staff seems to be having.
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Do you love me for me?... I don't even love me for me.
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When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don't always like that.
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Someday I'd like to be a father, not of a human child, but something more reasonable.
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Living by the beach means feeling guilty about never going to the beach.
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People increase their use of the term 'sir' when their angry. Little do they know, it only causes me to feel more like I'm wearing a top hat.
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Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem?
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If you love sleep, you'll really enjoy death.
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