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Animals look at people the way people look at people that might mug them.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
Only bugs can truly appreciate the beauty of flowers.
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Cheerleaders are simultaneously everything that is right and wrong with the world.
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Stop thanking god for your parking spot. He had nothing to do with it, and if he did, I want nothing to do with him.
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The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.
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No one understands the way I feel about things I don't understand.
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I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.
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MTV has turned more young women into whores than poverty.
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Nike store won't accept my Starbucks card as payment. Come on guys, just do it.
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Do you love me for me?... I don't even love me for me.
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A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
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If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
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When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don't always like that.
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Writing good jokes requires effort. Think I'll just start dressing funnier.
Dov Davidoff
Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.
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I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.
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I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.
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Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.
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We should create a holiday that celebrates money for what it is, essentially worthless paper, upon which we agree to pretend it has value.
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I wish that every other guy were gay. Think about the leverage that would create in your relationship.
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Fountains are more romantic when you don't hate the person you're with.
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