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Next time I spank a girl during sex, I'll say, this is going to hurt me more than it will you.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff

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The rift between culture and pop-culture has never been greater.
Dov Davidoff
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I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.
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Gotta get rid of these free radicals, but first I need to figure out what they are.
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The color red is associated with romance and blood, but not at the same time.
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I would imagine that most of the people who consider themselves successful aren't, at least in the ways that really matter-myself included.
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Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.
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America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.
Dov Davidoff
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Women want a man who is sensitive, but god forbid you can't get it up after being frightened by a small woodland animal.
Dov Davidoff
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Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.
Dov Davidoff
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White people set goals, rappers 'chase paper', and the Chinese are too busy doing both to talk about either one.
Dov Davidoff
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When maintaining a relationship means diminishing your self, it's time to walk.
Dov Davidoff
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Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one's life.
Dov Davidoff
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When rappers call each other son it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.
Dov Davidoff
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
Dov Davidoff
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When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don't always like that.
Dov Davidoff
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False humility is thinly veiled ego disguised as self confidence.
Dov Davidoff
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I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.
Dov Davidoff
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I'm no quitter, unless it comes to human relationships or math and science.
Dov Davidoff
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Do you ever have one of those weeks where you know nothings gonna go right?
Dov Davidoff
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Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
Dov Davidoff