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The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Life
Electricity
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Health
Free
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Things

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I wish that every other guy were gay. Think about the leverage that would create in your relationship.
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Age is just a number, unless of course your trying to have a conversation with them.
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Do you ever have one of those weeks where you know nothings gonna go right?
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If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.
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Big black guys fear air travel almost as much as old white women fear big black guys.
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If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.
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Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
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Every time I see someone taking care of a baby, I think why in the world would anyone willingly saddle themselves with that responsibility?
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Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one's life.
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People increase their use of the term 'sir' when their angry. Little do they know, it only causes me to feel more like I'm wearing a top hat.
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Living by the beach means feeling guilty about never going to the beach.
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The downside of aging is a slower metabolism and achy joints.The upside is a knowledge of self that prevents one from behaving like a baboon.
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You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.
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Animals look at people the way people look at people that might mug them.
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I'd put my faith in god, but I haven't met him, and I've been hurt before.
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America's objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women.
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It's difficult to feel silly and depressed at the same time, but I manage.
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The rift between culture and pop-culture has never been greater.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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Hard to explain to a guard dog that you need it to protect you from yourself.
Dov Davidoff