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Comedy is rarely funny.

Dov Davidoff

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Dov Davidoff
Funny
Rarely
Comedy

More quotes by Dov Davidoff

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Pine nuts pound for pound are more expensive than most varieties of smoked salmon. There I said it.
Dov Davidoff
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Drugs in a disco are great for white people because it allows them to feel more Puerto Rican while dancing.
Dov Davidoff
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Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.
Dov Davidoff
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
Dov Davidoff
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Thinking about the fathomless cruelty with which man has treated his fellow man, but also ice cream.
Dov Davidoff
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I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
Dov Davidoff
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We should create a holiday that celebrates money for what it is, essentially worthless paper, upon which we agree to pretend it has value.
Dov Davidoff
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Skin heads are doing an awful job of promoting racism. You guys need to loosen up, and for god's sake would it kill you to smile.
Dov Davidoff
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Fear can be a great motivator, just not during foreplay.
Dov Davidoff
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Is it a bad sign when someone asks you about the person your dating and a tear falls from your eye as you leap into oncoming traffic?
Dov Davidoff
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Nike store won't accept my Starbucks card as payment. Come on guys, just do it.
Dov Davidoff
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Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.
Dov Davidoff
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I spend so much time alone that whenever I see my shadow I feel crowded.
Dov Davidoff
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People shouldn't take my lack of interest in what they're saying personally. I don't really care about what I'm saying most of the time.
Dov Davidoff
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I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.
Dov Davidoff
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I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.
Dov Davidoff
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Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.
Dov Davidoff
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Brain damage and stupidity are very different things, but can have similar effects on the wearer.
Dov Davidoff
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Why hasn't anyone opened a night club named 'No Drugs Allowed, Wink, Wink'?
Dov Davidoff
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False humility is thinly veiled ego disguised as self confidence.
Dov Davidoff