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Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don't want to talk to.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
Few things are more annoying than too many of any one ethnicity in the same room.
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I spend so much time alone that whenever I see my shadow I feel crowded.
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Hanging out with women on a platonic level is like spending time with someone from Europe. It's not better or worse, but it is different.
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When being interviewed by a woman for a job, never begin with listen up doll face.
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Lack of sleep is only bad if you have to drive, or think, or talk, or move.
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Few things are as uniquely painful as bad comedy, and the realization that the human mind is a house of mirrors with no entrance and no exit.
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If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
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Was thinking of taking a yoga class, then realized I wasn't gay. Whew. Close one.
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Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.
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Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.
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The entertainment business is to business what plastic flowers are to flowers.
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The color red is associated with romance and blood, but not at the same time.
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If you got it, flaunt it may be decent advice for prostitutes, but no one else.
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People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.
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Do you love me for me?... I don't even love me for me.
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I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.
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When cornered, a rattle snake can become so angry it's been known to bite itself, which is exactly how I feel in traffic and relationships.
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A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.
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Thinking about the fathomless cruelty with which man has treated his fellow man, but also ice cream.
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Anyone who says I would never hit a woman hasn't met my x girlfriend.
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