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I wish I could be attracted to unattractive women. They're just more interesting.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
Life is fragile, unless your in the NFL in which case you'll need to wear padding.
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Do you love me for me?... I don't even love me for me.
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Drugs in a disco are great for white people because it allows them to feel more Puerto Rican while dancing.
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Nike store won't accept my Starbucks card as payment. Come on guys, just do it.
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Fake titties are inversely proportioned to their owners level of self esteem. This being said, part of me loves them.
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Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.
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White people set goals, rappers 'chase paper', and the Chinese are too busy doing both to talk about either one.
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I'm passionate about gay rights, but I think we need admit that there are some gay wrongs as well.
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Bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend sends you reeling in a search for new adjectives to describe stupidity and thoughtlessness?
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I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.
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Animals look at people the way people look at people that might mug them.
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You can't fool the American people - politician trying to fool the American people.
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Whoever said life without love isn't worth living didn't own an iPhone. These things are great.
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Living by the beach means feeling guilty about never going to the beach.
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People who say life is precious don't spend much time on line at the airport.
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Pine nuts pound for pound are more expensive than most varieties of smoked salmon. There I said it.
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I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.
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I've decided to retreat to the spirit world where I feel appreciated and understood.
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Everybody wants to be more wanted, until they are.
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Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.
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