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I wish I could be attracted to unattractive women. They're just more interesting.
Dov Davidoff
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Dov Davidoff
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More quotes by Dov Davidoff
Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
Dov Davidoff
Being anti-social can also mean that you're aware of how annoying it is to be social.
Dov Davidoff
Fear can be a great motivator, just not during foreplay.
Dov Davidoff
Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem?
Dov Davidoff
How come the term 'threesome' is always used in a sexual context? What, nobody plays string instruments any more?
Dov Davidoff
America's objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women.
Dov Davidoff
Guys don't use the word pretty enough. Like, hey Mike, did you get that shirt at the game? Looks really pretty on you.
Dov Davidoff
I don't know if it's the economy, but finding work as a spiritual guru is really hard. Maybe I should grow my hair out.
Dov Davidoff
Upside of being an attractive woman if you're remotely intelligent, people will treat you like you're brilliant. Downside: same thing.
Dov Davidoff
Facebook is great for getting upset about things people say even though you haven't seen them in 12 years.
Dov Davidoff
If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.
Dov Davidoff
The Nazis were well dressed. Today's racists are a rag-tag bunch with no sense of style or panache.
Dov Davidoff
Few things interest me more than the things people don't say.
Dov Davidoff
Every time I see someone taking care of a baby, I think why in the world would anyone willingly saddle themselves with that responsibility?
Dov Davidoff
Pine nuts pound for pound are more expensive than most varieties of smoked salmon. There I said it.
Dov Davidoff
Whoever said life without love isn't worth living didn't own an iPhone. These things are great.
Dov Davidoff
Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.
Dov Davidoff
People would be so much more interesting if they'd behave like who they are, and not like what they think others expect them to be.
Dov Davidoff
You can't assume the best about people. If I get a girl home and she takes her pants off, and it looks like she's got herpes, I can't afford to assume she got stung by a pack of bees.
Dov Davidoff
You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.
Dov Davidoff