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I wanted to be John Cleese. It took me some time to realise that the job was taken.
Douglas Adams
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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Time
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Realising
John
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More quotes by Douglas Adams
Will you stop counting!' snarled Zaphod. 'Yes,' said Ford Prefect, 'in three minutes and thirty-five seconds.
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Six pints of bitter, said Ford Prefect. And quickly please, the world's about to end.
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A fragrant breeze wandered up from the quiet sea, trailed along the beach, and drifted back to the sea again, wondering where to go next. On a mad impulse it went up to the beach again. It drifted back to sea.
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We all like to congregate at boundary conditions. Where land meets water. Where earth meets air. Where bodies meet mind. Where space meets time. We like to be on one side, and look at the other.
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Hey, this is terrific! he said. Someone down there is trying to kill us! Terrific, said Arthur. But don't you see what this means? Yes. We are going to die. Yes, but apart from that. Apart from that?! It means we must be on to something! How soon can we get off it?
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Technology is a word that describes something that doesn't work yet.
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I teleported home last night with Ron and Sid and Meg Ron stole Meggy's heart away and I got Sidney's leg.
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People who need to bully you are the easiest to push around.
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The waiter approached. 'Would you like to see the menu?' he said. 'Or would you like to meet the Dish of the Day?' 'Huh?' said Ford. 'Huh?' said Arthur. 'Huh?' said Trillian. 'That’s cool,' said Zaphod. 'We'll meet the meat.
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There's always a moment when you start to fall out of love, whether it's with a person or an idea or a cause, even if it's one you only narrate to yourself years after the event: a tiny thing, a wrong word, a false note, which means that things can never be quite the same again.
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These creatures you call mice, you see, they are not quite as they appear. They are merely the protrusion into our dimension of vastly hyperintelligent pandimensional beings.
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Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things
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If you really want to understand something, the best way is to try and explain it to someone else.
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Many men of course became extremely rich, but this was perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of because no one was really poor, at least no one worth speaking of.
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And as he drove on, the rainclouds dragged down the sky after him, for, though he did not know it, Rob McKenna was a Rain God. All he knew was that his working days were miserable and he had a succession of lousy holidays. All the clouds knew was that they loved him and wanted to be near him, to cherish him, and to water him.
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Nobody likes a whistler, particularly not the divinity that shapes our ends.
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Marvin trudged on down the corridor, still moaning. ...and then of course I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left hand side... No? said Arthur grimly as he walked along beside him. Really? Oh yes, said Marvin, I mean I've asked for them to be replaced but no one ever listens. I can imagine.
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The dew has fallen with a particularly sickening thud this morning.
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Imagine he said, never even thinking, 'We are alone,' simply because it has never occurred to you to think that there's any other way to be.
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No one really knows what mattresses are meant to gain from their lives either. They are large, friendly, pocket-sprung creatures that live quiet private lives in the marshes of Sqornshellous Zeta. Many of them get caught, slaughtered, dried out, shipped out and slept on. None of them seems to mind this and all of them are called Zem.
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