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I wanted to be John Cleese. It took me some time to realise that the job was taken.
Douglas Adams
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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Realise
Realising
John
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More quotes by Douglas Adams
I'm up to here with cool, okay? I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.
Douglas Adams
Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.
Douglas Adams
Fiordland, a vast tract of mountainous terrain that occupies the south-west corner of South Island, New Zealand, is one of the most astounding pieces of land anywhere on God's earth, and one's first impulse, standing on a cliff top surveying it all, is simply to burst into spontaneous applause.
Douglas Adams
I rarely end up where I was intending to go, but often I end up somewhere I needed to be.
Douglas Adams
Gordon Way's astonishment at being suddenly shot dead was nothing compared to his astonishment at what happened next.
Douglas Adams
The first ten million years were the worst, said Marvin, and the second ten million years, they were the worst too. The third ten million years I didn't enjoy at all. After that I went into a bit of a decline.
Douglas Adams
It was his subconscious which told him this - that infuriating part of a person's brain which never responds to interrogation, merely gives little meaningful nudges and then sits humming quietly to itself, saying nothing.
Douglas Adams
How do you know you're having fun if there's no one watching you have it?
Douglas Adams
Marvin was humming ironically because he hated humans so much.
Douglas Adams
There was one planet off in the seventh dimension that got used as a ball in a game of intergalactic bar billiards. Got potted straight into a black hole.
Douglas Adams
But what about the End of the Universe? We'll miss the big moment. I've seen it. It's rubbish, said Zaphod,nothing but a gnab gib. A what? Opposite of a big bang. Come on, let's get zappy.
Douglas Adams
I seldom end up where I wanted to go, but almost always end up where I need to be.
Douglas Adams
Meanwhile, the poor Babel fish, by effectively removing all barriers to communication between different races and cultures, has caused more and bloodier wars than anything else in the history of creation.
Douglas Adams
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
Douglas Adams
The bird that would soar above the plain of tradition and prejudice must have strong wings.
Douglas Adams
He actually caught himself saying things like Yippee, as he pranced ridiculously round the house.
Douglas Adams
The bowler approached the wicket at a lope, a trot, and then a run. He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball.
Douglas Adams
The light works, he said, indicating the window, the gravity works, he said, dropping a pencil on the floor. Anything else we have to take our chances with.
Douglas Adams
The seat received him in a loose and distant kind of way, like an aunt who disapproves of the last fifteen years of your life and will therefore furnish you with a basic sherry, but refuses to catch your eye.
Douglas Adams
Listen, three eyes, he said, don't you try to outweird me, I get stranger things than you free with my breakfast cereal.
Douglas Adams
