Quote

I wanted to be John Cleese. It took me some time to realise that the job was taken.

Douglas Adams

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Time
Realise
Realising
John
Took
Taken
Jobs
Wanted

More quotes by Douglas Adams

Image
The Ultimate Answer to Life, The Universe and Everything is...42!
Douglas Adams
Image
The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead.
Douglas Adams
Image
Mc Donalds he thought. There's no longer any such thing as a Mc Donalds hamburger. He passed out. When he came around seconds later he found he was sobbing for his mother.
Douglas Adams
Image
A theory of the universe that states: If anyone finds out what the universe is for, it will disappear and be replaced by something more bizarrely inexplicable.
Douglas Adams
Image
We live in strange times. We also live in strange places, each in a universe of our own. The people with whom we populate our universe are the shadows of whole other universes intersecting with our own.
Douglas Adams
Image
Rather than arriving five hours late and flustered, it would be better all around if he were to arrive five hours and a few extra minutes late, but triumphantly in command.
Douglas Adams
Image
Why' is the only question that bothers people enough to have an entire letter of the alphabet named after it. The alphabet does not go 'A B C D What? When? How?' but it does go 'V W X Why? Z.
Douglas Adams
Image
And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before--and thus was the Empire forged.
Douglas Adams
Image
...and the renewed shock had nearly made him spill his drink. He drained it quickly before anything serious happened to it. He then had another quick one to follow the first one down and check that it was all right.
Douglas Adams
Image
The idea that Bill Gates (one of the founders of Microsoft) has appeared like a knight in shining armour to lead all customers out of a mire of technological chaos neatly ignores the fact that it was he, by peddling second rate technology, led them into it in the first place...
Douglas Adams
Image
If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a nonworking cat.
Douglas Adams
Image
A computer terminal is not some clunky old television with a typewriter in front of it. It is an interface where the mind and body can connect with the universe and move bits of it about.
Douglas Adams
Image
Pardon me for breathing, which I never do any way so I don’t know why I bother to say it, oh God, I’m so depressed.
Douglas Adams
Image
He has personality problems beyond the dreams of analysts.
Douglas Adams
Image
Simple. I got very bored and depressed, so I went and plugged myself in to its external computer feed. I talked to the computer at great length and explained my view of the Universe to it, said Marvin. And what happened? pressed Ford. It committed suicide, said Marvin and stalked off back to the Heart of Gold.
Douglas Adams
Image
Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen. [...] Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.
Douglas Adams
Image
Much to his annoyance, a thought popped into his mind. It was very clear and very distinct, and he had now come to recognize these thoughts for what they were. His instinct was to resist them.
Douglas Adams
Image
To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.
Douglas Adams
Image
Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.
Douglas Adams
Image
We can't win against obsession. They care, we don't. They win.
Douglas Adams