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The fact is, I don't know where my ideas come from. Nor does any writer. The only real answer is to drink way too much coffee and buy yourself a desk that doesn't collapse when you beat your head against it.

Douglas Adams

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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Much
Head
Collapse
Way
Fact
Beat
Facts
Coffee
Doesn
Beats
Doe
Answer
Ideas
Drink
Come
Writer
Desk
Real
Answers
Desks

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Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.
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Yes it is,' said the Professor. 'Wait—' he motioned to Richard, who was about to go out again and investigate— 'let it be. It won't be long.' Richard stared in disbelief. 'You say there's a horse in your bathroom, and all you can do is stand there naming Beatles songs?' The Professor looked blankly at him.
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Please call me Eddie if it will help you to relax.
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I'm up to here with cool, okay? I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.
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...they discovered only a small asteroid inhabited by a solitary old man who claimed repeatedly that nothing was true, though he was later discovered to be lying.
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What do you get if you multiply six by nine? Six by nine. Forty two. That's it. That's all there is. I always thought something was fundamentally wrong with the universe
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The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second.
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He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.
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Who is this god person anyway?
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Presidents don't have power. Their job is to draw attention away from it.
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Dennis Hutch had stepped up into the top seat when its founder had died of a lethal overdose of brick wall, taken while under the influence of a Ferrari and a bottle of tequila.
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No one really knows what mattresses are meant to gain from their lives either. They are large, friendly, pocket-sprung creatures that live quiet private lives in the marshes of Sqornshellous Zeta. Many of them get caught, slaughtered, dried out, shipped out and slept on. None of them seems to mind this and all of them are called Zem.
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It takes an awful lot of time to not write a book.
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My capacity for happiness, he added, you could fit into a matchbox without taking out the matches first
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This man is the bee's knees, Arthur, he is the wasp's nipples. He is, I would go so far as to say, the entire set of erogenous zones of every major flying insect of the Western world.
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I think we have different value systems. Well, mine's better.
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Curiously enough, the only thing that went through the mind of the bowl of petunias as it fell was Oh no, not again. Many people have speculated that if we knew exactly why the bowl of petunias had thought that we would know a lot more about the nature of the Universe than we do now.
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Ok, he said, I don't like to disturb you at what I know must be a difficult and distressing time for you, but I need to know first of all if you actually realize that this is a difficult and distressing time for you.
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See first, think later, then test. But always see first. Otherwise you will only see what you were expecting. Most scientists forget that.
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If you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any form of language.
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