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Listen, three eyes, he said, don't you try to outweird me, I get stranger things than you free with my breakfast cereal.

Douglas Adams

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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Eyes
Free
Eye
Three
Trying
Cereal
Things
Breakfast
Stranger
Listen

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The point is, you see, said Ford, that there is no point in driving yourself mad trying to stop yourself going mad. You might just as well give in and save your sanity for later.
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It all sounds rather naive and sentimental to be talking about children laughing and dancing and singing together when we all know perfectly well that what children do in real life is snarl and take drugs.
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Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses have been specially designed to help people develop a relaxed attitude to danger. At the first hint of trouble, they turn totally black and thus prevent you from seeing anything that might alarm you.
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Ballycumber (ba-li-KUM-ber) n. One of the six half-read books lying somewhere in your bed.
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He has personality problems beyond the dreams of analysts.
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And then, just when you think that you have experienced all the wonders that this world has to offer, you round a peak and suddenly think you're doing the whole thing over again, but this time on drugs.
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I rarely end up where I was intending to go, but often I end up somewhere I needed to be.
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All through my life I've had this strange unaccountable feeling that something was going on in the world, something big, even sinister, and no one would tell me what it was. No, said the old man, that's just perfectly normal paranoia. Everyone in the Universe has that.
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Even light, which travels so fast it takes most races thousands of years to realize that it travels at all, takes time to journey between the stars.
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A fragrant breeze wandered up from the quiet sea, trailed along the beach, and drifted back to the sea again, wondering where to go next. On a mad impulse it went up to the beach again. It drifted back to sea.
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I wanted to be John Cleese. It took me some time to realise that the job was taken.
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Yes it is,' said the Professor. 'Wait—' he motioned to Richard, who was about to go out again and investigate— 'let it be. It won't be long.' Richard stared in disbelief. 'You say there's a horse in your bathroom, and all you can do is stand there naming Beatles songs?' The Professor looked blankly at him.
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Pardon me for breathing, which I never do any way so I don’t know why I bother to say it, oh God, I’m so depressed.
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One of the most important things you learn from the internet is that there is no 'them' out there. It’s just an awful lot of 'us.'
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For seven and a half million years, Deep Thought computed and calculated, and in the end announced that the answer was in fact Forty-two - and so another, even bigger, computer had to be built to find out what the actual question was.
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Arthur felt happy. He was terribly pleased that the day was for once working out so much according to plan. Only twenty minutes ago he had decided he would go mad, and now here he was already chasing a Chesterfield sofa across the fields of prehistoric Earth.
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If they don’t keep exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working.
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To Trin Tragula's horror, the shock completely annihilated her brain but to his satisfaction he realized that he had proved conclusively that if life is going to exist in a Universe of this size, then the one thing it cannot afford to have is a sense of proportion.
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Fifteen years was a long time to be stranded anywhere, particularly somewhere as mind-boggingly dull as Earth.
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I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
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