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Please relax, said the voice pleasantly, like a stewardess in an airliner with only one wing and two engines one of which is on fire, you are perfectly safe.

Douglas Adams

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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Perfectly
Wings
Safe
Airliner
Please
Stewardess
Fire
Pleasantly
Voice
Wing
Two
Engines
Like
Relax

More quotes by Douglas Adams

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It takes an awful lot of time to not write a book.
Douglas Adams
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Arthur shook his head and sat down. He looked up. “I thought you must be dead …” he said simply. “So did I for a while,” said Ford, “and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks. I kept myself amused all that time jumping in and out of a gin and tonic.
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Really, the moment you have any idea, the second thought that enters your mind after the original idea is, What is this? Is it a book, is it a movie, is it a this, is it a that, is it a short story, is it a breakfast cereal? Really, from that moment, your decision about what kind of thing it is then determines how it develops.
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What a wonderfully exciting cough,' said the little man, quite startled by it, 'do you mind if I join you?' And with that he launched into the most extraordinary and spectacular fit of coughing which caught Arthur so much by surprise that he started to choke violently, discovered he was already doing it and got thoroughly confused.
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I think the problem, to be quite honest with you, is that you've never actually known what the question is.
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Please call me Eddie if it will help you to relax.
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Do you find coming to terms with the mindless tedium of it all presents an interesting challenge?
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Marvin started his ironical humming again. Zaphod hit him and he shut up.
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Pardon me for breathing, which I never do any way so I don’t know why I bother to say it, oh God, I’m so depressed.
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We live in strange times. We also live in strange places, each in a universe of our own. The people with whom we populate our universe are the shadows of whole other universes intersecting with our own.
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Deep in the fundamental heart of mind and Universe there is a reason.
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If I were not an atheist, I think I would have to be a Catholic because if it wasn't the forces of natural selection that designed fish, It must have been an Italian.
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Simple. I got very bored and depressed, so I went and plugged myself in to its external computer feed. I talked to the computer at great length and explained my view of the Universe to it, said Marvin. And what happened? pressed Ford. It committed suicide, said Marvin and stalked off back to the Heart of Gold.
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Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen. [...] Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.
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The impossible often has a kind of integrity to it which the merely improbable lacks. How often have you been presented with an apparently rational explanation of something that works in all respects other than one, which is just that it is hopelessly improbable? Your instinct is to say, 'Yes, but he or she simply wouldn't do that.
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We all like to congregate at boundary conditions. Where land meets water. Where earth meets air. Where bodies meet mind. Where space meets time. We like to be on one side, and look at the other.
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He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher... or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.
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When people you greatly admire appear to be thinking deep thoughts, they probably are thinking about lunch.
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WOKING (vb.) To enter the kitchen with the precise determination to perform something only to forget what it is just before you do it.
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...and the renewed shock had nearly made him spill his drink. He drained it quickly before anything serious happened to it. He then had another quick one to follow the first one down and check that it was all right.
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