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It seemed to me,' said Wonko the Sane, 'that any civilization that had so far lost its head as to need to include a set of detailed instructions for use in a package of toothpicks, was no longer a civilization in which I could live and stay sane.

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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Needs
Civilization
Instructions
Stay
Package
Longer
Packages
Head
Galaxy
Use
Include
Lost
Instruction
Live
Sane
Toothpicks
Need
Seemed
Detailed

More quotes by Douglas Adams

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WOKING (vb.) To enter the kitchen with the precise determination to perform something only to forget what it is just before you do it.
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You just come along with me and have a good time. The Galaxy's a fun place. You'll need to have this fish in your ear.
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This must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
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If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
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Don't blame you, said Marvin and counted five hundred and ninety-seven thousand million sheep before falling asleep again a second later.
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The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.
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I refuse to prove that I exist says God, for proof denies faith, and without faith, I am nothing. Oh, says man, but the Babel Fish is a dead give-away, isn't it? It proves You exist, and so therefore You don't. Q.E.D. Oh, I hadn't thought of that, says God, who promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.
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Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses have been specially designed to help people develop a relaxed attitude to danger. At the first hint of trouble, they turn totally black and thus prevent you from seeing anything that might alarm you.
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You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish. Unless of course, you play bass.
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Numbers written on restaurant bills within the confines of restaurants do not follow the same mathematical laws as numbers written on any other pieces of paper in any other parts of the Universe. This single fact took the scientific world by storm.
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Life,” said Marvin dolefully, “loathe it or ignore it, you can’t like it.
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The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second.
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Everything you see or hear or experience in any way at all is specific to you. You create a universe by perceiving it, so everything in the universe you perceive is specific to you.
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The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead.
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Solutions nearly always come from the direction you least expect, which means there's no point trying to look in that direction because it won't be coming from there.
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One of the most important things you learn from the internet is that there is no 'them' out there. It’s just an awful lot of 'us.'
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Arthur blinked at the screens and felt he was missing something important. Suddenly he realized what it was. Is there any tea on this spaceship? he asked.
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He turned slowly like a fridge door opening.
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Fifteen years was a long time to be stranded anywhere, particularly somewhere as mind-boggingly dull as Earth.
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He would have felt safe if alongside the Dentrassis' underwear, the piles of Sqornshellous mattresses and the man from Betelgeuse holding up a small yellow fish and offering to put it in his ear he had been able to see just a small packet of cornflakes. But he couldn't, and he didn't feel safe.
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