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Sherlock Holmes observed that once you have eliminated the impossible then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the answer. I, however, do not like to eliminate the impossible.
Douglas Adams
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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
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Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
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More quotes by Douglas Adams
I have always been absurdly, ridiculously tall. To give you an idea- when we went on school trips to Interesting and Improving Places, the form-master wouldn't say Meet under the clock tower, or Meet under the War Memorial, but Meet under Adams.
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Anything invented before your fifteenth birthday is the order of nature. That's how it should be. Anything invented between your th and th birthday is new and exciting, and you might get a career there. Anything invented after that day, however, is against nature and should be prohibited.
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The little waiter's eyebrows wandered about his forehead in confusion.
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Solutions nearly always come from the direction you least expect, which means there's no point trying to look in that direction because it won't be coming from there.
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WOKING (vb.) To enter the kitchen with the precise determination to perform something only to forget what it is just before you do it.
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Perhaps I'm old and tired, but I always think that the chances of finding out what really is going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say hang the sense of it and just keep yourself occupied.
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Most of the time spent wrestling with technologies that don't quite work yet is just not worth it for end users, however much fun it is for nerds.
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Dirk turned on the car wipers, which grumbled because they didn't have quite enough rain to wipe away, so he turned them off again. Rain quickly speckled the windscreen. He turned on the wipers again, but they still refused to feel that the exercise was worthwhile, and scraped and squeaked in protest.
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Siamese Cats have a way of staring at you. Those who have walked in on the Queen cleaning her teeth will know the expression.
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All through my life I've had this strange unaccountable feeling that something was going on in the world, something big, even sinister, and no one would tell me what it was. No, said the old man, that's just perfectly normal paranoia. Everyone in the Universe has that.
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I am terribly proud of-I was born in Cambridge in 1952 and my initials are DNA!
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For seven and a half million years, Deep Thought computed and calculated, and in the end announced that the answer was in fact Forty-two - and so another, even bigger, computer had to be built to find out what the actual question was.
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How do you feel? he asked him. Like a military academy, said Arthur. Bits of me keep on passing out.
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First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII — and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure.
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Life... is like a grapefruit. Well, it's sort of orangey-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have half a one for breakfast.
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People who need to bully you are the easiest to push around.
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The kakapo is a bird out of time. If you look one in its large, round, greeny-brown face, it has a look of serenely innocent incomprehension that makes you want to hug it and tell it that everything will be all right, thought you know that it probably will not be.
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I seem to be having tremendous difficulty with my life-style
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Even the evil-looking bird perched on a rod in the bar had stopped screeching out the names and addresses of local contract killers, which was a service it provided for free.
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Who is this god person anyway?
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