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Ok, he said, I don't like to disturb you at what I know must be a difficult and distressing time for you, but I need to know first of all if you actually realize that this is a difficult and distressing time for you.

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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Firsts
Need
First
Distressing
Must
Disturb
Needs
Realize
Time
Realizing
Like
Actually
Difficult

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I think the problem, to be quite honest with you, is that you've never actually known what the question is.
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I am terribly proud of-I was born in Cambridge in 1952 and my initials are DNA!
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You know, said Arthur, it's at times like this, when I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young. Why, what did she tell you? I don't know, I didn't listen.
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The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead.
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Very strange people, physicists - in my experience the ones who aren't dead are in some way very ill.
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You can't dodge your responsibilities by saying they don't exist!
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If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a nonworking cat.
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Driving a Porsche in London is like bringing a Ming vase to a football game.
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How do you know you're having fun if there's no one watching you have it?
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God is no longer an explanation of anything, but has instead become something that would itself need an insurmountable amount of explaining.
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The idea was fantastically, wildly improbable. But like most fantastically, wildly improbable ideas it was at least as worthy of consideration as a more mundane one to which the facts had been strenuously bent to fit.
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A fragrant breeze wandered up from the quiet sea, trailed along the beach, and drifted back to the sea again, wondering where to go next. On a mad impulse it went up to the beach again. It drifted back to sea.
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Please relax, said the voice pleasantly, like a stewardess in an airliner with only one wing and two engines one of which is on fire, you are perfectly safe.
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Nobody got murdered before lunch. But nobody. People weren't up to it. You needed a good lunch to get both the blood-sugar and blood-lust levels up.
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When people you greatly admire appear to be thinking deep thoughts, they probably are thinking about lunch.
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Let us be dreamers, thinkers, speculative philosophers, or as our spouses would have it: Idiots
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You ARE Zaphod Beeblebrox?' 'Yeah,' said Zaphod, 'but don't shout it out or they'll all want one.' 'THE Zaphod Beeblebrox?' 'No, just A Zaphod Beeblebrox, didn't you hear I come in six packs?' 'But sir,' it squealed, 'I just heard on the sub-ether radio report. It said you were dead...' 'Yeah, that's right, I just haven't stopped moving yet.
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In the center lay the exploded carcass of a lonely sperm whale that hadn't lived long enough to be disappointed with its lot.
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I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
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Marvin trudged on down the corridor, still moaning. ...and then of course I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left hand side... No? said Arthur grimly as he walked along beside him. Really? Oh yes, said Marvin, I mean I've asked for them to be replaced but no one ever listens. I can imagine.
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