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Pardon me for breathing, which I never do any way so I don’t know why I bother to say it, oh God, I’m so depressed.
Douglas Adams
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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Never
Marvin
Paranoid
Pardon
Depressed
Bother
Breathing
Way
More quotes by Douglas Adams
In the center lay the exploded carcass of a lonely sperm whale that hadn't lived long enough to be disappointed with its lot.
Douglas Adams
Yes it is,' said the Professor. 'Wait—' he motioned to Richard, who was about to go out again and investigate— 'let it be. It won't be long.' Richard stared in disbelief. 'You say there's a horse in your bathroom, and all you can do is stand there naming Beatles songs?' The Professor looked blankly at him.
Douglas Adams
You can't dodge your responsibilities by saying they don't exist!
Douglas Adams
The dew has fallen with a particularly sickening thud this morning.
Douglas Adams
Don't spin your wheels and stress. Take a deep breath, center yourself and make a plan.
Douglas Adams
He inched his way up the corridor as if he would rather be yarding his way down it, which was true.
Douglas Adams
I have always been absurdly, ridiculously tall. To give you an idea- when we went on school trips to Interesting and Improving Places, the form-master wouldn't say Meet under the clock tower, or Meet under the War Memorial, but Meet under Adams.
Douglas Adams
I think the problem, to be quite honest with you, is that you've never actually known what the question is.
Douglas Adams
The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second.
Douglas Adams
The fact is, I don't know where my ideas come from. Nor does any writer. The only real answer is to drink way too much coffee and buy yourself a desk that doesn't collapse when you beat your head against it.
Douglas Adams
The great thing about being the only species that makes a distinction between right and wrong is that we can make up the rules for ourselves as we go along.
Douglas Adams
Will you stop counting!' snarled Zaphod. 'Yes,' said Ford Prefect, 'in three minutes and thirty-five seconds.
Douglas Adams
Life... is like a grapefruit. Well, it's sort of orangey-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have half a one for breakfast.
Douglas Adams
The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.
Douglas Adams
Numbers written on restaurant bills within the confines of restaurants do not follow the same mathematical laws as numbers written on any other pieces of paper in any other parts of the Universe. This single fact took the scientific world by storm.
Douglas Adams
I don't say that I don't believe in God because that implies that there is a God for me not to believe in.
Douglas Adams
Who should play the lead role in a film about me? Dunno. Danny De Vito? Jeff Goldblum? Meryl Streep? Someone of that kind.
Douglas Adams
Dennis Hutch had stepped up into the top seat when its founder had died of a lethal overdose of brick wall, taken while under the influence of a Ferrari and a bottle of tequila.
Douglas Adams
There was one planet off in the seventh dimension that got used as a ball in a game of intergalactic bar billiards. Got potted straight into a black hole.
Douglas Adams
On the delivery plate of the Nutri-Matic Drink Synthesizer was a small tray, on which say three bone china cups and saucers, a bone china jug of milk, a silver teapot full of the best tea Arthur had ever tasted and a small printed note saying Wait.
Douglas Adams