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The quality of any advice anybody has to offer has to be judged against the quality of life they actually lead.
Douglas Adams
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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Offer
Offers
Lead
Advice
Anybody
Quality
Smelly
Actually
Life
Judged
More quotes by Douglas Adams
So you can imagine what happens when a mainland species gets introduced to an island. It would be like introducing Al Capone, Genghis Khan and Rupert Murdoch into the Isle of Wight - the locals wouldn't stand a chance.
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Everything you see or hear or experience in any way at all is specific to you. You create a universe by perceiving it, so everything in the universe you perceive is specific to you.
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We live in strange times. We also live in strange places, each in a universe of our own. The people with whom we populate our universe are the shadows of whole other universes intersecting with our own.
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Unfortunately this Electric Monk had developed a fault, and had started to believe all kinds of things, more or less at random. It was even beginning to believe things they'd have difficulty believing in Salt Lake City.
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And so the problem remained lots of the people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the ones with digital watches.
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Rather than arriving five hours late and flustered, it would be better all around if he were to arrive five hours and a few extra minutes late, but triumphantly in command.
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I love to keep poking and prodding at it. I’ve thought about it so much over the years that that fascination is bound to spill over into my writing.
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Grown men, he told himself, in flat contradiction of centuries of accumulated evidence about the way grown men behave, do not behave like this.
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My capacity for happiness, he added, you could fit into a matchbox without taking out the matches first
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Nobody got murdered before lunch. But nobody. People weren't up to it. You needed a good lunch to get both the blood-sugar and blood-lust levels up.
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Conceited little mega-puppy.
Douglas Adams
There are some oddities in the perspective with which we see the world.
Douglas Adams
Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast.
Douglas Adams
After a while he played with the pencil and the paper again and was delighted when he discovered how to make a mark with the one on the other. Various noises continued outside, but he didn't know whether they were real or not. He then talked to his table for a week to see how it would react.
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The kakapo is a bird out of time. If you look one in its large, round, greeny-brown face, it has a look of serenely innocent incomprehension that makes you want to hug it and tell it that everything will be all right, thought you know that it probably will not be.
Douglas Adams
Who is this god person anyway?
Douglas Adams
Being virtually killed by a virtual laser in a virtual space is just as effective as the real thing, because you are as dead as you think you are.
Douglas Adams
Much to his annoyance, a thought popped into his mind. It was very clear and very distinct, and he had now come to recognize these thoughts for what they were. His instinct was to resist them.
Douglas Adams
I have terrible periods of lack of confidence. I just don't believe I can do it and no evidence to the contrary will sway me from that view.
Douglas Adams
Imagine a puddle waking up one morning and thinking, This is an interesting world I find myself in, an interesting hole I find myself in fits me rather neatly, doesn't it? In fact it fits me staggeringly well! It must have been made to have me in it!
Douglas Adams
