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The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.

Douglas Adams

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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Inaccurate
Definitive
Frequently
Statistics
Guide
Guides
Reality

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A mobile phone needs a manual in the way that a teacup doesn't
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The only person for whom the house was in any way special was Arthur Dent, and that was only because it happened to be the one he lived in.
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Please call me Eddie if it will help you to relax.
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He learned to communicate with birds and discovered their conversation was fantastically boring. It was all to do with windspeed, wingspans, power-to-weight ratios and a fair bit about berries.
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The bowler approached the wicket at a lope, a trot, and then a run. He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball.
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I rarely end up where I was intending to go, but often I end up somewhere I needed to be.
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He has personality problems beyond the dreams of analysts.
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How do you know you're having fun if there's no one watching you have it?
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Who is this god person anyway?
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The only moral it is possible to draw from this story is that one should never throw the Q letter into a privet bush, but unfortunately there are times when it is unavoidable.
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If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a nonworking cat.
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The Guide says there is an art to flying, said Ford, or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
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Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.
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If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.
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Trillian had come to suspect that the main reason [Zaphood] had had such a wild and successful life was that he never really understood the significance of anything he did.
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A life that is burdened with expectations is a heavy life. Its fruit is sorrow and disappointment.
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Moving from radio to television, you can take most of the words with you.
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Even the evil-looking bird perched on a rod in the bar had stopped screeching out the names and addresses of local contract killers, which was a service it provided for free.
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When you walk through the storm, hold your head high And don't be afraid of the dark! At the end of the storm is a golden sky And the sweet song of the lark. Walk on through the wind Walk on through the rain Though your dreams be tossed & blown Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart And you'll never walk alone!
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Many men of course became extremely rich, but this was perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of because no one was really poor, at least no one worth speaking of.
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