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For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

Douglas Adams

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Douglas Adams
Age: 49 †
Born: 1952
Born: March 11
Died: 2001
Died: May 11
Comedian
Novelist
Playwright
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Douglas Noel Adams
Douglas Noël Adams
Douglas N. Adams
Happens
Nothing
Galaxy
Continued
Second
Happen
Happened
Moment
Moments

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There is an art to the business of making sandwiches which it is given to few ever to find the time to explore in depth. It is a simple task, but the opportunities for satisfaction are many and profound.
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Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.
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It was one of those pictures that children are supposed to like but don't. Full of endearing little animals doing endearing things, you know?
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The bowler approached the wicket at a lope, a trot, and then a run. He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball.
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Anything that thinks logically can be fooled by something else that thinks at least as logically as it does.
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I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
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God is no longer an explanation of anything, but has instead become something that would itself need an insurmountable amount of explaining.
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I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?
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This must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
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She had what it took: great hair, a profound understanding of strategic lip gloss, the intelligence to understand the world and a tiny secret interior deadness which meant she didn’t care.
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I wanted to be John Cleese. It took me some time to realise that the job was taken.
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All you really need to know for the moment is that the universe is a lot more complicated than you might think, even if you start from a position of thinking it's pretty damn complicated in the first place.
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If I were not an atheist, I think I would have to be a Catholic because if it wasn't the forces of natural selection that designed fish, It must have been an Italian.
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The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79.
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Fiordland, a vast tract of mountainous terrain that occupies the south-west corner of South Island, New Zealand, is one of the most astounding pieces of land anywhere on God's earth, and one's first impulse, standing on a cliff top surveying it all, is simply to burst into spontaneous applause.
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The impossible often has a kind of integrity to it which the merely improbable lacks. How often have you been presented with an apparently rational explanation of something that works in all respects other than one, which is just that it is hopelessly improbable? Your instinct is to say, 'Yes, but he or she simply wouldn't do that.
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And the most interesting natural structure? A giant, two-thousand-mile-long fish in orbit around Jupiter, according to a reliable report in the Weekly World News. The photograph was very convincing, and I'm only surprised that more-reputable journals like New Scientist, or even just The Sun, haven't followed up with more details. We should be told.
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There is a feeling which persists in England that making a sandwich interesting, attractive, or in any way pleasant to eat is something sinful that only foreigners do.
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Presidents don't have power. Their job is to draw attention away from it.
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The most misleading assumptions are the ones you don't even know you're making.
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