Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
If second hand smoke is killing that many people and nicotine is so addictive then why is no one addicted to second hand smoke?
Doug Stanhope
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Doug Stanhope
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: March 25
Cabaret Artist
Comedian
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Writer
Worcester
Massachusetts
Douglas Stanhope
Hand
Hands
Many
Nicotine
People
Addictive
Addicted
Smoke
Killing
Second
More quotes by Doug Stanhope
I love conspiracy theories. I used to just live on it. You know it's all hype and garbage, but you're still really paranoid afterwards. It's fun entertainment.
Doug Stanhope
One UK paper described me as a miserablist, a word I'd never heard before or since. I looked it up and it means someone who can only be happy when they are miserable. Perfect.
Doug Stanhope
Boredom is a disease worse than cancer. Drugs cure it.
Doug Stanhope
Sex and children are the two things that delude logic the most in this society.
Doug Stanhope
Life is like animal porn, it's not for everyone.
Doug Stanhope
This is Lakshmi Singh. It's like a tadpole dying in muck. Take a drink. Wet your mouth.
Doug Stanhope
A lot of the Olympic games just boil down to genetics. Michael Phelps is genetically built to swim better than other people if he trains the same way. You might as well have a competition for who's the tallest, and act like it's anyone's game!
Doug Stanhope
Mutations are exciting. They try to fix 'em when they come out. Did you see the two-headed baby they killed last month when they tried to cut it apart? That was hilarious!
Doug Stanhope
When I say that asian women are beautiful it's not a sexual thing. I'm not being degrading, I find them sexually repulsive.
Doug Stanhope
I'm gonna film my entire life and watch it later!
Doug Stanhope
The first thing I think of when I wake up is how close I am to death. But then it gets better during the day.
Doug Stanhope
Charlie Chaplin said something to the effect that humor is an act of defiance, that we must laugh in the face of our helplessness in the forces of nature or go insane. And where is he now? Dead.
Doug Stanhope
Abortion is green! I think its irrefutable, but people don't want to hear that. For most people, having children is an instinctual, natural desire and the last thing they want to do is believe that it has any detrimental side, or if they do believe it, they think it's different for them because they live in a gated community or whatever the reason.
Doug Stanhope
I sometimes wonder if necrophiliacs are really into dead people or if they just enjoy the quiet.
Doug Stanhope
Everything that is going to kill you is extremely appetizing.
Doug Stanhope
Pot is to narcotics what herpes is to social diseases it doesn't count cos it's not really dangerous and it's too easy to get.
Doug Stanhope
I love playing in the UK because there are some topics that you just can't talk about in the States without getting run out of town. So let me just say this: Louis C. K.'s new show sucks.
Doug Stanhope
Do you ever wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and think, something's not accurate?
Doug Stanhope
Love is such an arbitrary thing. I love my mom. I love pancakes.
Doug Stanhope
Coward is the most misused word in our society.
Doug Stanhope