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Charlie Chaplin said something to the effect that humor is an act of defiance, that we must laugh in the face of our helplessness in the forces of nature or go insane. And where is he now? Dead.
Doug Stanhope
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Doug Stanhope
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: March 25
Cabaret Artist
Comedian
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Writer
Worcester
Massachusetts
Douglas Stanhope
Humor
Defiance
Dead
Charlie
Face
Insane
Faces
Forces
Force
Effect
Nature
Laugh
Must
Effects
Chaplin
Something
Laughing
Helplessness
More quotes by Doug Stanhope
I don't have a gun. But I think they level the playing field. I accept that there's really nothing you can do about it. It's like nuclear weapons if they exist then eventually other people are going to have them. Maybe just take away people's motivation to use them.
Doug Stanhope
What if I don't want a leader? Where does that vote go? I do good on my own. I don't want to be led.
Doug Stanhope
Get the right to marry - and then don't.
Doug Stanhope
Everything that is going to kill you is extremely appetizing.
Doug Stanhope
You have options when it comes to abortion now. It's not like 1955 when you just had to kick her down a staircase and hope for the best... you feed her a tapeworm and hope it takes a left at the Y.
Doug Stanhope
Your instinct is your true god. Follow it.
Doug Stanhope
If I die soon, don't ever say I died too young.
Doug Stanhope
I'm not the one-take wonder that a lot people think I am.
Doug Stanhope
Here's the path to sobriety: Play the Ron Paul drinking game. Watch CNN and take a drink every time someone says his name.
Doug Stanhope
When you consider the overpopulation in this world ... homosexuality is completely underrated in this society.
Doug Stanhope
There's nothing funnier than getting a death threat via MySpace. Why don't you just write it in a children's birthday card.
Doug Stanhope
So you stick something up your ass, and you hope it might work, and it usually helps.
Doug Stanhope
The whole institution of marriage itself really has no place in a progressive society.
Doug Stanhope
Life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and it’s sucked every second so far, it probably isn't going to get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early.
Doug Stanhope
AA makes Scientology look credible.
Doug Stanhope
A lot of the Olympic games just boil down to genetics. Michael Phelps is genetically built to swim better than other people if he trains the same way. You might as well have a competition for who's the tallest, and act like it's anyone's game!
Doug Stanhope
If second hand smoke is killing that many people and nicotine is so addictive then why is no one addicted to second hand smoke?
Doug Stanhope
That's why cocaine is illegal - it makes pussy too easy to get.
Doug Stanhope
The Mind is everything. Do drugs. But just don't have drugs.
Doug Stanhope
Mutations are exciting, there aren't nearly enough of them.
Doug Stanhope
