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The motion picture Deadpool was my favorite funny movie of [2016]. Something that I could just watch over and over again, because it's just so... he says so many things.
Doug Benson
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Doug Benson
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: July 2
Comedian
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Screenwriter
Television Actor
San Diego
California
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More quotes by Doug Benson
Society has definitely gotten to the point where everybody has to comment on anything, and if you want to stay sane as a performer, you're better off not reading that stuff.
Doug Benson
I'm not physically harming any of these people by being high, and it's just interesting to see that I feel like my values and morals don't change at all when I'm high, but that's a constant. The thing that changes when I'm high is I am happier, and I'm not good with numbers.
Doug Benson
I used to make love to Green Day's music. But 9 minutes? I'm not Superman.
Doug Benson
You know you drank too much the night before when you wake up with crop circles in your pubes.
Doug Benson
LL Cool J should be the spokesman for a line of pajamas called Ladies Love Cool Jammies.
Doug Benson
I was immediately into all the great movie comedians - Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, Richard Pryor, Gene Wilder. Everything those guys had anything to do with, from I don't know how young. Super young.
Doug Benson
Rappers should be forced to rhyme in their acceptance speeches.
Doug Benson
I grew up in San Diego, so it wasn't hard to move to L.A. to get into show business, but I did the standard thing of just moving without much money and just seeing if I could make it work.
Doug Benson
Tom Cruise shouldn't try to win Oscars. He should just smile and kick people in the face and leave the acting to Hugh Jackman. Why Hugh Jackman? I dunno come up with your own example, smart-ass.
Doug Benson
[Deadpool] is definitely squirm-inducing. It's a pretty hard R, violence-wise. But cartoony, also. Maybe fast-forward through to torture scenes.
Doug Benson
The great thing about being up early on a Sunday is nothing.
Doug Benson
Never really intended to be a comedian, just sort of fell into that, but always wanted to be in show business, or something to do with making comedy.
Doug Benson
In Seattle, they have a saying: 'If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes and then shoot yourself in the face.'
Doug Benson
In terms of my lungs, pot smoking is not like cigarette smoking. It doesn't affect the lungs as quickly, or as much over time. If I stopped pot smoking today, my lungs could heal probably 100 percent in a few years.
Doug Benson
The whole pot-to-alcohol thing is a huge issue with me, because I've grown to hate drunks so much, and like potheads.
Doug Benson
Everyone wants to look good in photographs, even us trolls who tell jokes.
Doug Benson
I've always enjoyed things that are popular,I mean, obviously, there are plenty of things that are popular that I hate. But when something like that is done right, I just think they nail it. I just think Modern Family is a really clever show.
Doug Benson
There's a lust to get on TV.
Doug Benson
Smoking pot makes people talk for long periods of time, for instance, so people who advocate pot won't shut the hell up about it.
Doug Benson
You can't always be 100-percent positive that a joke will work, so you've just got to try it. Fortunately, if one new joke doesn't work, I've got lots of old ones that do. Just like cops, it's important to have backup.
Doug Benson