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I wanted to be cute. That's the terrible thing. I should have had more sense.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Terrible
Sense
Wanted
Thing
Cute

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A list of authors who have made themselves most beloved and therefore, most comfortable financially, shows that it is our national joy to mistake for the first-rate, the fecund rate.
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You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.
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[On Katharine Hepburn's stage performance:] She ran the whole gamut of emotions, from A to B.
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I wish, I wish I were a poisonous bacterium.
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[On being told their loquacious, domineering host was 'outspoken':] By whom?
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The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt.
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Of Orson Welles: It's like meeting God without dying.
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The only “ism” Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
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I wouldn't touch a superlative again with an umbrella.
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But I don't give up I forget why not.
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Hollywood is the one place on earth where you could die of encouragement.
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There must be a magnificent disregard of your reader, for if he cannot follow you, there is nothing you can do about it.
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The ones I like are ‘cheque’ and ‘enclosed.’
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On being told of the death of former President Calvin Coolidge: How could they tell?
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[From a window in the Writer's Building at MGM, which overlooked a cemetery:] Hello down there. It might interest you to know that up here we are just as dead as you are.
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London is satisfied, Paris is resigned, but New York is always hopeful. Always it believes that something good is about to come off, and it must hurry to meet it.
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Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing. Winter's pretty lousy, but I hate Spring.
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Well, there are always those who cannot distinguish between glitter and glamour . . . the glamour of Isadora Duncan came from her great, torn, bewildered, foolhardy soul.
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Los Angeles: Seventy-two suburbs in search of a city.
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It's easier to write about those you hate — just as it's easier to criticize a bad play or a bad book.
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