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Eternity is a ham and two people.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Ham
Eternity
Two
People

More quotes by Dorothy Parker

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It's easier to write about those you hate — just as it's easier to criticize a bad play or a bad book.
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Dear Mary: We all knew you had it in you.
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Money was made, not to command our will, But all our lawful pleasures to fulfill. Shame and woe to us, if we our wealth obey The horse doth with the horseman away.
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[To the British actor who annoyed her by repeated references to his busy 'shedule':] I think you're full of skit.
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I shudder at the thought of men.... I'm due to fall in love again
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Nevil Shute's On the Beach is no Christmas carol, but it seems to me a remarkably fine novel, one which I read, in the peculiarly repulsive phrase, with my eyes glued to the page.
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The nowadays ruling that no word is unprintable has, I think, done nothing whatever for beautiful letters. ... Obscenity is too valuable a commodity to chuck around all over the place it should be taken out of the safe on special occasions only.
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Writing well is the best revenge.
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A liberal is a man who leaves the room before the fight starts.
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All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
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Of Orson Welles: It's like meeting God without dying.
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I wanted to be cute. That's the terrible thing. I should have had more sense.
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[Hospitalized and pressing the nurse's button before dictating letters to her secretary:] This should assure us of at least forty-five minutes of undisturbed privacy.
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It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day.
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The House Beautiful is the play lousy.
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The only useful thing I ever learned in school was that if you spit on your eraser it erased ink.
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You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.
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Out in Hollywood, where the streets are paved with Goldwyn.
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All I have to be thankful for in this world is that I was sitting down when my garter busted.
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Somewhere, there, is an analogy, in a small way, if you have the patience for it. But I guess it isn't a very good anecdote. I'm better at animal stories.
Dorothy Parker