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[On the ringing of her doorbell or telephone:] What fresh hell is this?
Dorothy Parker
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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Telephones
Fresh
Hell
Doorbell
Ringing
Telephone
More quotes by Dorothy Parker
And I'll stay off Verlaine too he was always chasing Rimbauds.
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Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
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But I give you my word, in the entire book there is nothing that cannot be said aloud in mixed company. And there is, also, nothing that makes you a bit the wiser. I wonder--oh, what will you think of me--if those two statements do not verge upon the synonymous.
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If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they're happy.
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[On William Lyon Phelps's Happiness:] It is second only to a rubber duck as the ideal bathtub companion. It may be held in the hand without causing muscular fatigue ... and it may be read through before the water has cooled. And if it slips down the drain pipe, all right, it slips down the drain pipe.
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Woman wants monogamy Man delights in novelty. Love is woman's moon and sun Man has other forms of fun. Woman lives but in her lord Count to ten, and man is bored. With this the gist and sum of it, What earthly good can come of it?
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The nowadays ruling that no word is unprintable has, I think, done nothing whatever for beautiful letters. ... Obscenity is too valuable a commodity to chuck around all over the place it should be taken out of the safe on special occasions only.
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The Swiss are a neat and an industrious people, none of whom is under seventy-five years of age.
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I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.
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If I had a shiny gun I could have a world of fun Speeding bullets through the brains Of the folks that cause me pains :)
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If, with the literate, I am Impelled to try an epigram, I never seek to take the credit We all assume that Oscar said it.
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When you have to apologize, it is well, I suppose, to get the thing over quickly.
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Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.
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It is that word 'hunny,' my darlings, that marks the first place in The House at Pooh Corner at which Tonstant Weader fwowed up.
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Said after she had been seriously ill: The doctors were very brave about it.
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I like to think of my shining tombstone. It gives me, as you might say, something to live for.
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[Epitaph:] Involved in a plot.
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I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours.
Dorothy Parker
It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day.
Dorothy Parker
If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.
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