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[On James Gould Cozzens' By Love Possessed:] It is a vast enterprise encompassing all sorts of love, except, naturally, those branches which extend to Jews, Negroes, and people who have lost track of their great-grandparents.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Naturally
Bigotry
Vast
James
Track
Sorts
Gould
Except
Possessed
Encompassing
Lost
Jews
Negroes
Great
Branches
Grandparents
Love
Jew
Grandparent
People
Enterprise
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All I have to be thankful for in this world is that I was sitting down when my garter busted.
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And I'll stay off Verlaine too he was always chasing Rimbauds.
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Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing. Winter's pretty lousy, but I hate Spring.
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The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt.
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The cleverest woman on earth is the biggest fool on earth with a man.
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Sorrow is tranquility remembered in emotion.
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I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
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I give her sadness and the gift of pain, a new moon madness and a love of rain.
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Q: What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? A: You can't hear an enzyme.
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I misremember who first was cruel enough to nurture the cocktail party into life. But perhaps it would be not too much to say, in fact it would be not enough to say, that it was not worth the trouble.
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There's life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
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I wish, I wish I were a poisonous bacterium.
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Money was made, not to command our will, But all our lawful pleasures to fulfill. Shame and woe to us, if we our wealth obey The horse doth with the horseman away.
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[On the ringing of her doorbell or telephone:] What fresh hell is this?
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Now, look, baby, 'Union' is spelled with 5 letters. It is not a four-letter word.
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Woman wants monogamy Man delights in novelty. Love is woman's moon and sun Man has other forms of fun. Woman lives but in her lord Count to ten, and man is bored. With this the gist and sum of it, What earthly good can come of it?
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They sicken of the calm who know the storm.
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I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours.
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Newton's Fourth Law: Every action has an equal and opposite satisfaction.
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This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn't touch a superlative again with an umbrella.
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