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A liberal is a man who leaves the room before the fight starts.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Politics
Fighting
Men
Liberal
Starts
Leaves
Room
Rooms
Fight

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People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
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[On being shown an apartment by a real estate agent:] Oh, dear, that's much too big. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
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She will never win him, whose words had shown she feared to lose.
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I shudder at the thought of men.... I'm due to fall in love again
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The House Beautiful is the play lousy.
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And if my heart be scarred and burned, The safer, I, for all I learned.
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Said of her husband on the day their divorce became final: Oh, don't worry about Alan. . . . Alan will always land on somebody's feet.
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Writing well is the best revenge.
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Ah, clear they see and true they say That one shall weep, and one shall stray
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The nowadays ruling that no word is unprintable has, I think, done nothing whatever for beautiful letters. ... Obscenity is too valuable a commodity to chuck around all over the place it should be taken out of the safe on special occasions only.
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This play John Drinkwater's Abraham Lincoln holds the season's record, thus far, with a run of four evening performances and one matinee. By an odd coincidence, it ran just five performances too many.
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I don't want to review books any more. It cuts in too much on my reading.
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[On hearing that President Coolidge was dead:] How can you tell?
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I can’t write five words but that I change seven.
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Somewhere, there, is an analogy, in a small way, if you have the patience for it. But I guess it isn't a very good anecdote. I'm better at animal stories.
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It's not the tragedies that kill us it's the messes.
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...as for helping me in the outside world, the Convent taught me only that if you spit on a pencil eraser, it will erase ink.
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Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you-- And if that makes you happy, kid, You'll be the first it ever did.
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[Requesting her epitaph to read this way:] Excuse my dust.
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If you're going to write, don't pretend to write down. It's going to be the best you can do, and it's the fact that it's the best you can do that kills you.
Dorothy Parker