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I wouldn't touch a superlative again with an umbrella.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Superlative
Superlatives
Umbrella
Touch
Wouldn

More quotes by Dorothy Parker

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They say of me, and so they should, It's doubtful if I come to good. I see acquaintances and friends Accumulating dividends And making enviable names In science, art and parlor games. But I, despite expert advice, Keep doing things I think are nice, And though to good I never come Inseparable my nose and thumb.
Dorothy Parker
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If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.
Dorothy Parker
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Q: What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? A: You can't hear an enzyme.
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Yes, well, let me tell you that if nobody had ever learned to quote, very few people would be in love with La Rochefoucauld. I bet you I don't know ten souls who read him without a middleman.
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Some men break your heart in two, Some men fawn and flatter, Some men never look at you And that cleans up the matter.
Dorothy Parker
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Woman wants monogamy Man delights in novelty. Love is woman's moon and sun Man has other forms of fun. Woman lives but in her lord Count to ten, and man is bored. With this the gist and sum of it, What earthly good can come of it?
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[To the British actor who annoyed her by repeated references to his busy 'shedule':] I think you're full of skit.
Dorothy Parker
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It was written without fear and without research.
Dorothy Parker
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[On hearing that President Coolidge was dead:] How can you tell?
Dorothy Parker
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I hate writing, I love having written.
Dorothy Parker
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The House Beautiful is the play lousy.
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If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.
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You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.
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Writing well is the best revenge.
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Scratch a king and find a fool!
Dorothy Parker
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Sometimes I think I'll give up trying, and just go completely Russian and sit on a stove and moan all day.
Dorothy Parker
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Where's the man could ease a heart Like a satin gown?
Dorothy Parker
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[From a window in the Writer's Building at MGM, which overlooked a cemetery:] Hello down there. It might interest you to know that up here we are just as dead as you are.
Dorothy Parker
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Los Angeles: Seventy-two suburbs in search of a city.
Dorothy Parker
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Despite his persecutions, Mr. [Upton] Sinclair reveals himself in Money Writes! to be an enviable man. Always the thing he desires to believe is the thing he feels he knows to be true.
Dorothy Parker