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If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Magnolias
Nice
Anything
Come

More quotes by Dorothy Parker

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I hate writing, I love having written.
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Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
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If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you.
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The Swiss are a neat and an industrious people, none of whom is under seventy-five years of age.
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On lady novelists: As artists they're rot, but as providers they're oil wells they gush. Norris said she never wrote a story unless it was fun to do. I understand Ferber whistles at her typewriter.
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She was pleased to have him come and never sorry to see him go.
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All I have to be thankful for in this world is that I was sitting down when my garter busted.
Dorothy Parker
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Eternity is a ham and two people.
Dorothy Parker
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Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
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all men are the same age.
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I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.
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Accursed from their birth they be Who seek to find monogamy, Pursuing it from bed to bed— I think they would be better dead.
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Oh, both my shoes are shiny new, And pristine is my hat My dress is 1922… My life is all like that.
Dorothy Parker
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The nowadays ruling that no word is unprintable has, I think, done nothing whatever for beautiful letters. ... Obscenity is too valuable a commodity to chuck around all over the place it should be taken out of the safe on special occasions only.
Dorothy Parker
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[When asked what was the inspiration for most of her work:] Need of money, dear.
Dorothy Parker
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If I don't drive around the park, I'm pretty sure to make my mark. If I'm in bed each night by ten, I may get back my looks again. If I abstain from fun and such, I'll probably amount to much But I shall stay the way I am, Because I do not give a damn.
Dorothy Parker
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But I give you my word, in the entire book there is nothing that cannot be said aloud in mixed company. And there is, also, nothing that makes you a bit the wiser. I wonder--oh, what will you think of me--if those two statements do not verge upon the synonymous.
Dorothy Parker
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All those writers who write about their own childhood! Gentle God, if I wrote about mine you wouldn't sit in the same room with me.
Dorothy Parker
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Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you-- And if that makes you happy, kid, You'll be the first it ever did.
Dorothy Parker
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But I don't give up I forget why not.
Dorothy Parker