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All those writers who write about their own childhood! Gentle God, if I wrote about mine you wouldn't sit in the same room with me.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Childhood
Wouldn
Autobiography
Room
Gentle
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Wrote
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God
Writing
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Writers
Mine

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One more drink and I'd have been under the host.
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There's life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
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Now to me, Edith looks like something that would eat her young.
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The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
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If I should labor through daylight and dark, Consecrate, valorous, serious, true, Then on the world I may blazon my mark And what if I don't, and what if I do?
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I fell into writing, I suppose, being one of those awful children who wrote verses. I went to a convent in New York-the Blessed Sacrament... I was fired from there, finally, for a lot of things, among them my insistence that the Immaculate Conception was spontaneous combustion.
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Just begin a story with such a phrase as 'I remember Disraeli - poor old Dizz! - once saying to me, in answer to my poke in the eye,' and you will find me and Morpheus off in a corner, necking.
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It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day.
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It is that word 'hunny,' my darlings, that marks the first place in The House at Pooh Corner at which Tonstant Weader fwowed up.
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[To the British actor who annoyed her by repeated references to his busy 'shedule':] I think you're full of skit.
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You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.
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Newton's Fourth Law: Every action has an equal and opposite satisfaction.
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At birth the Devil touched my tongue.
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Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
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tomorrow's gone-we'll have tonight!
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Accursed from their birth they be Who seek to find monogamy, Pursuing it from bed to bed— I think they would be better dead.
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I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.
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Where unwilling dies the rose buds the new another year.
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A liberal is a man who leaves the room before the fight starts.
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[On being shown an apartment by a real estate agent:] Oh, dear, that's much too big. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
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