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If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they're happy.
Dorothy Parker
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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
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Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
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More quotes by Dorothy Parker
People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
Dorothy Parker
They sicken of the calm who know the storm.
Dorothy Parker
Art is a form of catharsis emotional release, purging, cleansing, purifying.
Dorothy Parker
Accursed from their birth they be Who seek to find monogamy, Pursuing it from bed to bed— I think they would be better dead.
Dorothy Parker
All those writers who write about their own childhood! Gentle God, if I wrote about mine you wouldn't sit in the same room with me.
Dorothy Parker
Los Angeles: Seventy-two suburbs in search of a city.
Dorothy Parker
Said after she had been seriously ill: The doctors were very brave about it.
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[On Kay Strozzi in The Silent Witness:] Miss Strozzi ... had the temerity to wear as truly horrible a gown as ever I have seen on the American stage. ... Had she not luckily been strangled by a member of the cast while disporting this garment, I should have fought my way to the stage and done her in, myself.
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If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.
Dorothy Parker
I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
Dorothy Parker
Now, look, baby, 'Union' is spelled with 5 letters. It is not a four-letter word.
Dorothy Parker
The only useful thing I ever learned in school was that if you spit on your eraser it erased ink.
Dorothy Parker
I shudder at the thought of men.... I'm due to fall in love again
Dorothy Parker
Women and elephants never forget.
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The cleverest woman on earth is the biggest fool on earth with a man.
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Woman wants monogamy Man delights in novelty. Love is woman's moon and sun Man has other forms of fun. Woman lives but in her lord Count to ten, and man is bored. With this the gist and sum of it, What earthly good can come of it?
Dorothy Parker
The only “ism” Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
Dorothy Parker
Then she told herself to stop her nonsense. If you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them, more easily each time, so easily, soon, that you did not even realize you had gone out searching. Women alone often developed into experts at the practice. She must never join their dismal league.
Dorothy Parker
I can’t write five words but that I change seven.
Dorothy Parker
Hell's afloat in lover's tears.
Dorothy Parker